When you go out, look at the people around you. Don't they look like they're in a hurry to get somewhere? When you ask your friends out for a gathering, do you often get, "Sorry, I've got an appointment, or I've a meeting on that day"? Many people are chronically busy nowadays. They all have the compulsion to be successful as fast as possible. And to achieve that, they figure they have to compress five years of work into one, by moving five times faster! So they rush – developing a hard-nosed edge, sacrificing personal time and relationships, to get as much done as they can. But despite their earnest and wholehearted attempt to be successful, they often waste their effort because they lose their sense of direction – focusing on the trees, but failing to notice the forest – they end up running in circles. If you don't occasionally stop running and look up at the stars, how will you know which way is North? (Don't tell me you have a compass.) In real terms, this means you have to set some time everyday to stop, and reflect.
· What do I value in life?
· What does success mean to me?
· Has what I've done today brought me closer to my life's goal?
· How do I get from where I am, to where I want to be?
Yes, these questions require you to think deep; do some soul-searching. But when you have the answers, your mind will be clear. It's like driving a car with a clean windscreen... you can see where you’re going! I suggest you clean your windscreen every night by taking time to reflect. That way, your VISION will be as sharp as can be. Everyone needs a Vision – that vivid mental image of what you'd like to Be, Do, and Have in life. Without it, we can't see which way we're headed. And the only way to develop it is to pause, reflect, think deep, and search your soul.
*The Love of Having*
Have you heard of Retail Therapy? Women love it. It's the idea that you can go shopping, buy something you like, and it will make you feel good about yourself. In the Be-Do-Have model, buying stuff is obviously in the HAVING stage. People subconsciously feel that having more stuff, will make them become who they want to be (Have>>Be). But the sad part is, only the reverse is true. Being who you want to be, will lead you to having what such a person has (Be>>Do>>Have).
Many people are using the Retail Therapy model to feel successful. They scamper to earn as much money as they can, then they splurge it on a lavish lifestyle – fast car, high-class dining, luxurious apartment, hot nightspots, and exotic traveling. All these luxuries and status symbols are suppose to help them BE somebody... But unless they already know who they are on the inside, they often end up being nobody. Luxury rich, but cash poor. These people have spent all their money on the toys. They will never get rich because they have none left over to invest. We all know that you MUST use the money you accumulate to buy assets which produce residual income, if you are EVER going to achieve wealth and financial freedom.
As we rush through our day, making money and spending lavishly, in a race to be successful, perhaps we can realize that all it takes... is one diagnosis of a critical illness, one lawsuit that bankrupts you, or the death of a loved one, to shift your values in life. Suddenly the stuff you have isn't important anymore... You’d gladly give it all away to get back your health, to shelter your family, or to share more time with your loved one.
All a dying man wants is to be well again. All a homeless man wants is good food and a warm place to sleep at night. And all a grieving man wants, is to have spent more time with his loved ones. Don't let this happen to you. Slow down, pause, and reflect. Figure out what's important to you in life. Then spend more time doing what's important, rather than following the masses – being busy everyday; chasing an imaginary shopping list of what it takes to be successful. Remember… better to walk slowly in the right direction, than to dash madly all over the place.
Lance Ong is a Licensed Trainer of Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Master Practitioner of Hypnotherapy and Timeline Therapy. He does life coaching to help clients gain clarity of purpose, while removing mental blocks to success. Learn Lance’s philosophy for better living at his Internet Blog Site – “Wisdom to Create a Beautiful World” – www.lancism.com